I wait patiently by the window while PeeWee was looking over his bank statement. "I never anticipated that our new house addition would put us into debt", he sighed, "Nook... you dirty thief". The reflection of my face in the glass revealed a gorgeous six foot tall gorilla. I was wearing my press-on nails, which matched my fierce Dior jacket. Face beat with thick Revlon eye shadow. My eyes shifted to the river outside, where a lonely hamster was fishing on the shore. "Jane, would you come over here, dear", PeeWee requested. I waddled over to our custom made modern desk and sat in the chair opposite to PeeWee. "He's trying to scam us, that crook", PeeWee said under his breath. I exhaled and looked away. I always thought Tom Nook was a noble business man. And that robe... You should see him when a breeze takes him by surprise. What a man. "Jane, can you pay attention to me? These numbers, they aren't right..." "Y'know, I just think it's funny how you can afford Dolce & Gabbana pocket watches but you can't part with that hideous number 5 T-shirt" I snapped. "I need to get out of here, I need to escape". I beat my gorilla chest and hurled myself through the front door. Outside sat Hamlet, a hamster who could bench 40 pounds. In the heat of the moment, I picked him up by surprise and tossed him into the downstream river. "M'am, I'd like to have a word with you". It was Copper. The town's police officer. He had seen me commit assault from across the water. He was a well built man, fantastic posture. "I'm heading over there", he said, "and please don't try to run, or I'll have to detain you". I panicked and ran back into the house. "PeeWee they're coming for us", I yelled, "It's over PeeWee we have to LEAVE"! I hurried over to the kitchen and swung open the refrigerator. I could not make a run for it without my cherry wood ham. "What are you do-" PeeWee was cut off by the sound of the front door being kicked down. "You're under arrest for assault and battery", shouted Copper, "this doesn't have to be difficult. Put your hands behind your back and come with me to the station". I forgot to take my medication so my hormones were a little shaky. I tore my $600 Dior jacket off of me and threw it at the alert officer. While he was blinded I managed to make it out the door and into the wilderness. Who knows what is in store for me; what is around the next corner.
Okay this is part 1 I hope y'all love it
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Around the next corner I exit the woods and run straight for GracieGrace. My hairy gorilla legs waving in the wind, I haul all my energy through the City. When I flew through the glass open doors they SHATTERED in an instant, and all eyes were on me. On the rack directly in front of me, I saw... a vintage buttoned Yves Saint Laurent jacket. I looked up to see Gracie , glaring down on me with her giraffe neck. "Are you going to pay for these damages in cash, or credit?" A french accent spat. I looked around. I saw the destruction that I had created, and the fire, and the pain. I really took a moment, in the shade of Gracie's spine, to evaluate. Who, what, when, where, why, and how? Who: Me, Jane the Gorilla. What: I'm at a crossroads in my life. I've committed crime after crime... and for what? For RECOGNITION. For RESPECT. For REVERENCE. When: Right. Now. Where: Where I do my shopping on the weekends, GracieGrace. Why: Most likely hormonal imbalances, not completely sure, should go see a doctor. How: I am a gorilla in fantastic physical condition. I understand the situation. I did what a big girl should, and I moved that mountain out of the way to access the new stock of custom Gracie gowns. I grabbed the first small white dress I could find and hurled my body out the door, dress in hand. Once outside, I climbed GracieGrace and stood above the City, unstoppable. I swiftly changed into my freshly mopped dress, and cried out into the clouds, "NOOK, YOU CROOK!" I collapsed and fell off the building onto my side. Gracie was off to the side and witnessed it all. I could hear her French laughing. "C'homme-singe!" I assume she said something about how good I look in this dress. Anyway, I make it back on my feet again, and hand Gracie my credit card. I'm giving up because I fell on my side really hard and I'm actually in a lot of pain. I remember that I'll probably sleep in a cell tonight. "Merci, thank you" Gracie sings, as she takes it to the ATM outside and makes a transaction. I can't recall how many bags she withdrew because I black out shortly after sitting down.
I wake up, delirious, afraid, looking fabulous. I'm flowing down the river on my mattress. I'm not surprised, because I see Hamlet out of the corner of my eye with his new prosthetic arm, observing from a distance. I'm traveled into the waterfall, into nothingness.
I'm slapped awake by cold water, and I sense a smelly dog. Copper growls into my ear, "I told you not to run". I'm in a straight jacket that isn't even my size. Copper notices and coughs, "I got out the extra large one for you, monkey girl. My spouse PeeWee speaks up from the seating behind me, "Jane, don't listen to him"! But what has been said has been heard. I spit one of my teeth in his eye and he lets out a bone-chilling howl. "OHHHHH MY-" Copper's screams were silenced when PeeWee uppercut the officer into unconsciousness.
OMG part 2 is now up, what does the future hold for this loving couple?! Find out in the next update
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